Slightly edited for more funnyness otherwise true story
Dad: Hey son how are you?
Me: Pretty good
Dad: How was your test?
Dad: I am depressed because SARS closed down Motorola for one week. What should I do during this time?
Me: Sweet....free vacation. Why don't you play Mah Jong or Monopoly
Dad: Should I go play golf?
Me: Ok....go play golf
Dad: Kelly Smetters wears a mask playing golf here.
Me: Who's that?....how about a romantic candle lit dinner for two during your vacation?
Dad: Mom is laughing....she says I rather read a book on the crapper than be romantic
Me: Mom is right.
Dad: I want to retire when you graduate from college. Where should I live? Taiwan or California? Where do you want to live?
Me: How about you go live in Hawaii....I want to live in.....Texas or Tennessee
Dad: I want to be your neighbor. Why Tennessee?
Me: Ok be my neighbor....I like Tennessee because that's where Elvis is from and they have caves. I like the scenery when I drove through it over spring break....How about you go build a house inside a cave in Tennessee....that would be sweeeeet.
Dad: Mom says that's a good idea.....she likes Tennessee because Dolly Parton is there. She likes her.